Burnout, depression and stress-related complaints are the rule rather than the exception. Many people do not get enough satisfaction from life. Questions like “is this it?”or “what do I really want with my life?” everyone has asked themselves at some point. And fortunately, this is also increasingly a moment when you realize that you have insufficient contact with your feelings.
But why does it have to go wrong before we realize this? My mission is to reverse this trend and raise awareness before it’s too late (or before it goes wrong again). That is why I would like to explain to you why that contact with your feelings is so important. I’ll give you 5 reasons.
- Your feeling guides you
Very often we try to think in our head what we want. We try to think about what work suits us, what we want from a partner, how we want to shape our lives, etc. We make lists, do tests to find out what qualities we have and what suits us. But more and more often we find that when we have achieved that goal, it does not give us the satisfaction we expected or hoped for. How come? That’s because you made it up with your head.
But your head is not made for that. Your feeling gives you direction, your head makes plans for how you can achieve that goal. But if you skip the step of listening to your feelings and determining your direction from your feelings, the chance that the result will give you satisfaction is very small.
Your feelings indicate what makes you happy and what doesn’t. It is like an inner compass that indicates whether you are still on the right path. And if you have good contact with your feelings and know how that inner compass works, thenStress of choice or hesitation is a thing of the past. Just like making wrong choices and experiencing insufficient satisfaction.
- Your feelings give you limits
Burnout, it is an exception these days if you have NOT had to deal with it. How is it possible that we fall over en masse? Are we really being asked to do so much more than in the past? No, that’s not the biggest problem. The biggest problem is that we no longer have contact with our body and our feelings.
Our body clearly indicates what you can handle and what not, where your limits are. But when you no longer feel those signals or no longer know what they mean and how to respond to them, things go wrong. Then you go beyond your own limits and if you do that often enough and long enough, you will automatically fall over. Your feelings clearly indicate your limits. Your job is to notice and listen to them. And that’s the art. An art that nowadays fewer and fewer people master.
- It gives you peace of mind
Our thinking ability is extremely well developed. We are more intelligent than ever, but at the same time we are also more stressed than ever. Because thinking is nice, but where is that ‘off button’ again? A busy head, worrying, grinding, not being able to keep your head still. It is the flip side of our ability to think and reason.
Many people long for peace of mind. Hundreds of books have been written about it, courses have been created for it, tools have been devised for it, etc. But the core of finding peace in your head also lies in making room for your feelings. You can fight against your thoughts, but you can also make more space to feel. Personally, I find the latter more effective, because what you focus on grows.
So if you keep focusing on “I don’t want to worry anymore” and “how do I quiet my head?”, then the attention stays with your head. While if you learn to listen more to your feelings and to give your feelings more space, your head will automatically become calmer. And that approach is a lot more positive and kind to yourself.
- Your feeling makes you unique
What is expected of me? How should I behave? What is the dress code? How is it? What should I do? We spend all day adapting to the environment and expectations. In itself, that is partly necessary to be able to live together peacefully, but some of us have gone too far in this. I used to too. And I sometimes fall into that trap, if I’m honest, but luckily less and less. Because by constantly adapting in this way, you lose your own unique identity.
At a certain point I didn’t even know who I really was anymore. I asked myself the question: if I think away everything I do, perform and mean to others, who am I then? Then you come back to your feeling. Your experience, your preferences, your opinion, your vision make you who you are.
Give it more space and express it (from your feelings, don’t think about it) and you will become more authentic. And yes, that is very exciting and vulnerable, but it gives you so much! It literally makes you a nicer person. And who doesn’t want that?
5. Your feeling makes you feel alive
The most beautiful moments in our lives are those moments when you forgot about time, when you were detached from everything that was expected of you, what you still had to do or what others think of you. Those are the moments that stay with you, when you are completely in the moment and allow all the feelings that are there at that moment. Intense pleasure, pleasure, laughing without brakes, dancing without brakes, making love without brakes. Enjoy the moment, enjoy the connection with the people around you.
Allow and feel the love completely. Those are the moments when you feel you are alive. And those moments, your head has nothing to do with that. That is 100% feeling. So make room for that as much as possible!
I remember very well from when I was a walking head myself, that I felt the desire to have more contact with my feelings and to listen to them better, but I just really didn’t know how. Where do you start then? It has been quite a journey for me. More than once I felt misunderstood and felt I had to reinvent the wheel. But it doesn’t have to be that complicated, as long as you know where to start.
And that’s why I’ve created a practical course that should be the first step for anyone who recognizes this. I take you step by step to your feeling. I help you to get more peace of mind, more contact with your body and your feelings. And I teach you to listen to your intuition. I have a great offer especially for you as a reader of Nieuwetijdskind Magazine.