Appearing Confident To Others: 8 Tips

Appearing Confident To Others

Appearing confident to others this article you will know exactly how self-confidence works and you have ways that will make you feel more confident.

Everyone has their ups and downs and everyone struggles with self-confidence from time to time.

But if you want to appear confident, you don’t even need to have self-confidence.

And the nice thing is that by pretending to be confident, you actually become more confident in the long run.

In this article, we’ll give you 8 of the best tips on how to boost your confidence and ultimately feel more confident.

Purpose of this article: After reading this article you will know exactly how self-confidence works and you have ways that will make you feel more confident.

The meaning of being confident

What do you think when you see a beautiful girl with straight back, shoulders back and confident stepping into the bar?

Or when your colleague proudly announces that he has been promoted?

Some people will appreciate and respect such an attitude, but others are quick to label it as arrogant.

While there really is a big difference between self-confidence and arrogance!

The main difference is that arrogance is accompanied by a belief that other people are subservient.

Appearing Confident To Others

Self-confidence on the other hand is when you have respect for yourself and for others.

If the girl in the bar pushes the people around her out of the way and just acts like a ‘bitch’ then she is indeed arrogant yes.

If your coworker normally walks over others to get what he wants, then he too is arrogant.

But most of the time, arrogance is just a mask for a deep-seated insecurity. So be careful not to fall into that trap.

How do you come across as confident?

Think about the girl’s posture in the bar above.

She does not walk with arched back, shoulders forward and head bowed down. But right up straight!

Appearing Confident To Others

There are many ways to appear confident:

  • Sit comfortably in your chair or stand relaxed with your hands at your sides (and not in your pockets)
  • Make relaxed gestures
  • Talk at a natural pace
  • Make conscious eye contact with people
  • Before you answer, pause and think about your words
  • Take up appropriate space when you walk, stand or sit
  • Look at other people with your head straight up and not tilted or down
  • Express appreciation for another
  • Admit your own mistakes
  • Don’t use attenuations like “maybe” or “probably”
  • Don’t gossip about other people
  • Treat people with respect

If you’re feeling low on self-confidence, there are tricks to not only convince others that you have healthy self-confidence, but also yourself.

You can read those well-functioning tips and tricks later in this article.

Characteristics of confident people

What distinguishes confident people from arrogant or insecure people are the following characteristics:

  • Confident people (who are not arrogant) always have an open attitude.
  • They appear friendly and make eye contact with others.
  • They don’t need the approval of others.
  • They don’t take things too seriously or personally.

You can learn all these characteristics .

Appearing Confident To Others

There are different ways to do this (coaching, therapy, meditation, improving your posture, “power posing”, etc.), but the most important thing to realize is that you too can cultivate a healthy sense of self-confidence.

Be confident at work

The secret to self-confidence is largely in your posture.

Psychologist Amy Cuddy  is one of the most famous speakers in the field of “power posing”. This is a way of influencing your emotions by adopting a certain body position.

Her research shows that if people stand in a “power stance” for two minutes, for example the superman or wonder woman position (legs wide, chest out, hands on your sides), their testosterone level literally shoots up.

This also applies the other way around. So if you’re sitting in front of your computer with hunched shoulders and a hunched back all day, chances are you’re not feeling your best emotionally.

You can influence your emotions, and therefore your self-confidence, by literally adopting a better attitude.

Do you have a job interview? Or do you have a presentation at work that you are nervous about?

Try the following poses and exercises:

You will notice that this increases your self-confidence, you become more assertive and you generally take a much more positive attitude in life.

How to appear confident to women

Both men and women find it difficult to be confident when someone nice is around.

All alarm bells are ringing, all insecurities are emerging and all our painful baggage from the past is in danger of being unpacked and thrown on the street.

We fear rejection and heartbreak.

Appearing Confident To Others

Now it is especially easy for men to adopt a body position, just like above, (make your chest big, stand up straight, legs wide) that makes you appear confident to women.

But an important step to remember is to accept pain.

When you learn to be comfortable with rejection, pain and failure, then a confident version of yourself will emerge.

Appearing Confident To Others? 4 tips:

The following tips will help you not only appear confident to others, but also develop a healthy sense of self-confidence.

Tip 1: Make eye contact

Eye contact is crucial.

Just imagine a boy or girl coming up to you who keeps looking down at the floor, or can’t look into your eyes.

Doesn’t seem very confident, does it?

When you talk to someone, look them in the eye.

Or when you are in a group, switch between people. Is someone talking to you? Then keep eye contact.

The more you break eye contact, the more insecure you appear. Don’t look someone on the other side in the eye for too long, because that comes across as quite  creepy .

For even more information on how to build your confidence, I recommend watching this video from  Brittany Packnett :

Tip 2: Don’t fiddle with your hands or rock your legs

In addition to a lack of eye contact, fidgeting is another characteristic that betrays your insecurity.

Some people fidget with their hands, look at their nails, don’t know how to position themselves, move their leg up and down or nod just a little too much.

Appearing Confident To Others

Just try to stand still and stay calm. An important tip that helps with this is to practice with meditation and breathing exercises.

You can try this at home and even on the spot at a party if you don’t know how to behave:

  • Feel how your feet make contact with the ground
  • Relax your face, relax your forehead, the corners of your mouth, your lower jaw
  • Feel your belly move forward when you inhale and back when you exhale

Do this every time you feel nervous.

Tip 3: Speak clearly and at a slow pace

The above exercise also helps to keep your voice calm. Do you have a presentation or do you need to speak in front of a group?

The nerves can make your voice skyrocket or you can start talking super fast, which (rightly at that moment) makes you seem rather insecure.

Speak at a slow pace and speak clearly. Take the time to formulate your sentences if you need to.

Appearing Confident To Others

Practice articulating words at home if necessary. When you speak clearly, you appear much more confident.

Also, avoid making your tone skyrocket at the end of a sentence, such as with a question. There’s a big difference between “I’m Jessica?” and “I’m Jessica”.

Lower your voice slightly at the end of a sentence, so you immediately gain more authority.

Tip 4: Keep your hands in sight

Did you know that the first thing people look at is the hands? This dates back to the time when we all lived comfortably in caves.

We had to be able to immediately assess whether a new person was an enemy or friend, so we looked at what he or she had in their hands.

Was it a spear? Or a bunch of blackberries?

Your hands say a lot about you, so keep them in plain view and show you mean kindly. Don’t put them in your pockets and don’t cross your arms in front of you.

You can also use hand gestures to reinforce your story. Just don’t overdo it, because that’s counterproductive.

Take a confident attitude? 4 tips

Adopt a confident attitude with these 4 tips:

Tip 1: Pay attention to how you sit at the table

When you are talking to someone, or when you have a job interview or date, make sure you stand or sit up straight.

Keep your shoulders back and relaxed and your back long. Remember that your head is tied to a string from heaven.

This also offers you a lot of physical benefits. It makes you breathe better, your back is better supported and you just seem a lot more confident.

People who have a slovenly posture or who keep their bodies small are seen as insecure. Then you should do the opposite!

Tip 2: Pretend you won the marathon

Do you want to look like a winner? Roll your shoulders back, put your feet firmly on the floor, bring your chest forward and hold your head up.

Take up space with your body.

Practice the superman poses at home and cheer in front of the mirror as if you just won a marathon.

You can also dance in your own living room. All of these things cause your cortisol (your ‘stress hormone’) to go down and your happiness chemicals to skyrocket.

Tip 3: Do back exercises every day

If you have trouble keeping your shoulders back, do some back exercises while exercising. Go to a gym or do them at home.

Appearing Confident To Others

This strengthens the muscles in your back and automatically puts your body in a better position, without you having to think about it every time.

Try this exercise:

  1. Stand with your heels, buttocks and head against a wall.
  2. Bring your shoulder blades back until they also touch the wall.
  3. Do this daily and do it a little longer each time.

You can also do a plank exercise every other day. Get on your hands and toes on the floor, possibly also with your knees on the floor.

Make sure your lower back is not hollow, but that you arch it slightly. Stay in the plank position for one minute. This strengthens both your core and your back muscles.

Tip 4: Go on yoga

Yoga is truly one of the best ways to improve your posture.

The goal of yoga is meditation, but the postures are crucial.

With the different postures you learn to open your body and you learn to get more out of your head with breathing exercises.

Appearing Confident To Others

It is a wonderful way to relax, learn to think positively , build self-confidence and develop a healthier posture.

They are all attitudes that are aimed at improving your life. Try it out and see how it works for you.

Bonus tip

As a bonus tip, we would like to give you the following homework.

The next time you walk out the door, walk with your back straight, head up, shoulders back, smile on your face, and make eye contact with at least five strangers.

And then say “Hi”. They must look away first. You don’t know them anyway, so who cares?

It will be a little strange at first, but the more you practice this, the easier it will be to strike up a conversation with a stranger, attend a party, give a presentation, etc.

Good luck! And if you’ve tried this, let us know in the comments below how it was for you.

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