Sometimes you no longer follow the right course or you follow a path that no longer suits you. That can be a bit confusing. Or you slowly notice that the things – which previously gave you such energy – now cost you more energy. Unnoticed, this can sometimes take quite a while and eventually start to feel like a kind of cage. You actually have everything, your work is going well, the children are doing well and you really have a good time together. Until someone points out what you actually say or do more often. Or you get a signal that makes it clear to you.
5 tips to manifest at your pace
The broom through
Then it’s time to sweep your life. This sounds very big, but can be oh so liberating. Sweeping through the things that no longer work for you, that keep you from following your heart. That provides a breath of fresh air that can turn everything upside down. Or right again?
That’s how I did it myself for my practice at the end of last year. I was ready for something new. Things no longer went the way I wanted and I decided to spar with a good business coach, one that I knew would look beyond my company. That afternoon something very important was awakened in me.
My coach knew exactly the right questions with her pure being. She managed to touch me, so that I started to feel and think about who I am and what I have to offer. Whether this is about my company or about you in your own life, your work, your relationship. Someone who knows how to ask the right questions is worth gold!
Within 2 minutes she had turned everything around and what came next was right. I didn’t have to think about what my new steps would be. I could start acting from my desire.
Broom truck over your own soil
And then it really starts. Packed with a lot of new information, tips and strategies to set up my new target group and routes, I drove all the way from Emmeloord back to Waalwijk. When something feels right, you don’t think about distance. People also come to me from Friesland or the Ardennes.
I had decided to put a solid foundation under my practice, not just to quickly take a new path, but really consciously a new foundation. You know the saying ‘be careful what you’re wishing for’?
I soon learned that you can’t just strengthen the bottom of your company. After all, I am my own company and my soil was therefore reinforced. And sometimes it’s good that you don’t know everything in advance, but that you just gradually experience, feel and experience what comes your way. Because to be able to solidify something in a good way, to take a new path, that requires transformation. Also when it comes to your relationship or what you would like to change in your upbringing. Wherever your path takes you, you will also face challenges.
Winter, no packing season
I don’t do things halfway: when I do something, I do it well and thoroughly. I gathered the people around me that I had wanted to work with for some time so that my new path would not only remain a map, but would also actually be taken. Everything would be ready at the end of the spring, so that the promotion could start before the summer. I felt like it.
But it was winter. And I live more and more according to the seasons. I found that I couldn’t put myself to what I had to do, that it was too much. I found that by holding on to my deadline, I wasn’t getting to what I longed for. Winter calls for a step back, taking it easy, turning inwards and exploring what still needs attention and can be healed. In order to be able to come to full bloom again in spring and summer. And so everything was right again, because there was also room for my own process in this.
Deadline became lifeline
I let go of my deadline and lived my life. I did what was necessary on all fronts, such as mother, partner, daughter, wife, girlfriend… While maintaining my own limits and from my own possibilities, so as close to myself as possible. What was special was that in the spring, when we went on holiday to England, I read something about how people in Beijing experience time in an old Happinez. They have a vertical and horizontal time there. In the West, we live by horizontal time, the time that can be controlled, the time of deadlines because we want to achieve something we have in mind, the time that makes us feel so pressured all the time.
Vertical time, the time they use most in Beijing, is like a stream of water, as Christine Cayol describes it. Time does not seem to play a role in vertical time, but beautiful moments coincide. Read more about vertical time here.
When I read this, I felt peace. This is how I want to live. They do not set deadlines in Beijing. They start a project together, see how it goes. They feel, experience and adjust in between, based on how things are going, not based on what has been devised beforehand. In this way they always live in the moment and a project can come to full maturity every time, because what is needed at the moment is done, what the situation demands. For me, the word deadline rightfully became a dead end. Lifeline is the right word.
When you keep seeing what you want to achieve as a deadline, things get really exciting for you, especially when it comes to your relationship. Then it has to get better within a certain time, other than….? Yes, then what? Then you break up, then it stops? This pressure keeps you from doing what it really takes. It is precisely from the open-mindedness and thus the trust that what is needed to grow together can unfold where you want to be, where you long for.
And so it is for you
The course of my own process was necessary to set up my practice properly. Because it also applies to you when you want to take a new path with your partner, that you have to go over your own soil with a broom wagon. It’s not just ‘I’m going to do the new thing I want to do’.
It’s really about letting go of the old, going through this transformation. It is about clearing within yourself what no longer serves your relationship. Entering into your own process to be able to create a new, different and more solid ground among your togetherness. Waking up yourself and seeing who you are, what your value is, what you have to offer yourself and your partner, to stand for it. Having fun together again requires hard work, turning things upside down, daring to look at the dark sides, to look the pain in the eye. In order to reconnect with the other from a pure self, to start feeling your original love again.
I realize better than anyone that my own process was necessary beforehand to become even better at this than I already was. Because doing something that sometimes crosses your path is quite different from attracting to yourself what makes you so happy.
Is it time for you and you for a new path, a solid foundation under your relationship, one that can handle everything again? Do you also need someone who will ask you exactly the right questions, questions that touch and get you moving? Request a free introductory meeting , so that we can see what I can do for you and you.