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Earth Angel Assertiveness- Doreen Virtue

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Below is a quote from my new favorite book which will be published in October 2014, but can already be ordered. ( in English, at Bol.com )

earth angels

Earth Angels are obsessed with other people’s happiness. When someone you love feels bad, you start to feel bad about yourself. Sometimes you blame yourself for making the other person feel bad. This creates the Earth Angels cycle of mutual dependence, where your own happiness depends on that of another. And because you have no control over the happiness of others, you feel that you also have no control over your own happiness, because it is connected to the happiness of others.

Earth Angels are normally ‘conflict phobic’, meaning they are afraid of disagreements and confrontations. To an earth angel, angry people are the opposite of happy people. So when an earth angel has to deal with an angry person, an earth angel closes emotionally and usually immediately responds to the wishes of the angry person.

Earth Angels feel that it is their fault if someone is unhappy or angry. They then feel that they have failed in their mission to bring happiness to others. This results in earth angels doing almost everything to keep the good peace!

Their conflict phobia makes Earth Angels prime targets for manipulative people who take advantage of the kindness of others. Before learning their earthly lesson about guarding boundaries, earth angels often become prey to narcissistic people who are only interested in satisfying their own needs. We will discuss this topic in more detail in this book.angels-are-everywhere

Earth Angels are in a difficult situation because their life purpose is to bring peace to the world. Earth Angels are lights sent from heaven to radiate peace and happiness and to raise the consciousness and vibrations of others.

So Earth Angels are normally the nicest, sweetest and friendliest people in the world! More precisely, they praise themselves for being so sweet in the most difficult situations (although Earth Angels sometimes lose their cool when pushed to their limits).

Earth Angels see themselves as strong, even though they are highly sensitive. They take on the burdens of others and rarely ask others for help. When help is offered, Earth Angels will not accept it. They are afraid to hinder another. An Earth Angel thinks: “If I allow this person to help me, he/she must put in a lot of effort that makes him/her feel tired or sad. I don’t want to arouse that in someone else, so I do everything myself.”

Because Earth Angels can see the hidden potential and inner light of everyone, they tend to condone the hurtful behavior of others—especially toward themselves. Earth Angels protect even those who mistreat them. The Earth Angel will say

“Ah, they didn’t mean it that way, it wasn’t that bad” or “They just weren’t having their day”. The person who behaves hurtful does not have to make an effort to justify his/her behavior, because the Earth Angel does this for him/her!

How is one supposed to learn the effects of his/her behavior if the Earth Angels continue to approve of their behavior? How is one supposed to take responsibility for his/her life when the Earth Angels offer to do anything for him/her?angelic

Earth Angels are here to bring more light into the world, not to allow people’s self-centered behavior! By constantly indulging in all of their relationships, Earth Angels suffer from symptoms of imbalance, including:

resentment. They feel that they are being used for their kindness, and that they do not get that kindness in return. This resentment builds up and becomes a poisonous, acidic energy that embitters the Earth Angel, and it can lead to health problems.

exhaustion. Constant giving takes a lot of your time, energy, finances and other resources. You may stay up late and get up early to spend enough time with others.

Money Problems . Do you pay everything? This is an unhealthy imbalance in your relationships.

Health Problems . Earth Angels develop serious health problems as a result of their own energetic imbalance. These range from skin problems (suppressed anger) to weight problems (protecting oneself with body fat) to throat problems (being afraid to speak up) to chest problems (taking care of everyone until you’re exhausted).

If you have a lot of self-esteem, you will choose relationships with nice people who won’t take advantage of you. However, most Earth Angels are attracted to unhappy people who need to be “healed”“. This gives the Earth Angels a sense of purpose.

You may meet genuinely nice people but don’t realize this or aren’t attracted to them because they’re already healed. So your heart beats faster when you meet unhappy or angry people because they are a challenge to you. “I can make him happy”, you decide subconsciously.

Other people may feel that you would do anything to see them happy. So they take advantage of you; their pleasure, support and happiness depend on you. And when they are unhappy (which is the case most of the time,

because they have to give happiness to themselves , and thus are unhappy when they take advantage of another, or look outside of themselves for happiness), they give you the debt! And you, in turn, blame yourself, and your light darkens.

Part of your life purpose is learning how to have healthy boundaries between yourself and others. It’s about loving other people in a way that’s healthy, rather than just allowing or allowing everything the other person wants.

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