Did you know that….
one in ten men is color blind?
And did you know that a man’s beard grows fastest in the spring?
All nice and nice of course these kinds of facts…
But the best are the facts that actually help you.
That’s why in this article you get interesting facts about men to better understand that complicated male brain.
- About no less than 20 fun, funny and interesting facts about men
- All about the biggest differences between men and women
- The most important facts about men and love
- Why men deal with their emotions differently than women
- Why he flips so much when his favorite soccer team loses
- And much more….
A look inside the male brain…
If you sometimes don’t seem to understand a thing about men, I can assure you this:
You’re not the only one.
Every day we receive numerous emails from our readers who have questions such as:
- Why does a man suddenly become distant?
- Why isn’t he listening to me?
- Why do men seem to be just out for sex?
- Why don’t men say clearly what they want?
- Why does he always leave the toilet seat up?
All of these questions and the associated frustrations often stem from the following:
Many women are not aware of the major differences between the male brain and the female brain
Because as soon as you understand the male brain better, it immediately becomes much more fun and easier to deal with men.
Understanding men better has many advantages in dates, relationships and the general interaction with the (enigmatic) opposite sex.
Now I could provide you with a dusty exposition of the great differences between man and woman…
But of course it’s much more fun to take a look at the most interesting facts about men.
Facts that most women don’t know.
Together with dating coach Mathijs I have put together the best 20 facts about men and love.
Fact 1: Men listen differently than women
It is a common complaint from women:
men don’t listen.
Although it can sometimes be quite irritating if the gentleman pays more attention to his favorite football team than to you, this is not quite right.
Most men do listen…
The thing is, men listen in a different way than women. As a result, women are under the impression that men are not listening.
Women listen empathically. They listen with their feelings and try to empathize with the other.
This helps to deal with a particular problem.
(This is why women are much more likely to talk about things to deal with them than men do).
Men, on the other hand, listen in a solution-oriented way. While you are talking about a problem, he is constantly working on how to solve this problem.
You have an argument with a girlfriend and you want to express your frustration with your boyfriend or husband.
The first thing he says is:
“But if you find the fight so annoying, why don’t you talk it out?”
You just wanted to talk about the fight to vent. He wanted to solve the problem immediately.
So he does listen, but with a completely different approach than you would like.
Fact 2: They are more afraid of you than you are of them
In the past, when my nursery was occasionally infested by innocent spiders, my mother used to say:
“Ah, don’t be afraid of that. They are more afraid of you than you are of them.”
And my mama’s wise saying applies to men too.
We often get questions from women who are nervous about a date . We also have to deal with women who suffer from low self-esteem or who are afraid of rejection.
These women often want to do well. They don’t want to go off in front of their Prince Charming.
Since I also coach men, I can safely tell you this:
men have this fear too.
Perhaps much worse than women.
Men are terrified of being rejected by women. They are afraid of screwing up dates. They go out of their way to impress you.
(Even if that is sometimes awkward).
if men ever make you nervous, remember this wise lesson:
They are more afraid of you than you are of them.
Fact 3: Men are constantly (unconsciously) concerned with hierarchy
If there is one crucial difference between man and woman, it is this:
Men are concerned with hierarchy, women with connections.
This becomes clear in this study into the differences between the causes of depression between men and women.
In the case of women, these causes often lie in the social sphere . For example, think of problems with their children or quarrels with people in the area.
A major cause in men is losing their job.
This is because a man’s financial status matters. If he loses his income, he drops in the financial ranking.
But men’s obsession with status isn’t limited to finances.
Men want to be better other men in all aspects
A bigger car, lifting more weight at the gym or running faster:
a man attaches great importance to being high in the hierarchy and therefore wants to do better than other men.
(I will come back to this later).
Fact 4: Men are visual creatures
50 Shades of Gray has topped bestsellers lists several times since its release.
The sexually oriented book, or well… the sexually soaked book to be more precise, is by far the most read by women.
Yet, in general, men watch more porn than women.
Have you ever wondered why men watch porn and women read “porn”?
This is due to the following:
Men are more strongly stimulated by visual images than women
This is evident from this research, among other things.
This is exactly why a man gets instantly aroused at the sight of a woman in sexy lingerie.
When it comes to sexual arousal, men are like light switches. One tap and they are fully on.
Women, on the other hand, are more like dimmer switches. They generally need a longer build-up to really get excited.
This is partly due to the fact that a single visual stimulation already makes him quite excited.
Fact 5: Men find flirting very difficult
You probably already knew this one.
You meet a nice man, he seems very charming but as soon as he opens his mouth it looks something like this:
It’s pretty clear:
the flirting of most men isn’t exactly “James Bond” level.
Like many women, most men find it difficult or downright uncomfortable to flirt.
After all, flirting is not a skill that we are taught in school.
Slimy compliments, offering countless drinks or staring at you creepily :
they are all very clumsy attempts by men to flirt.
Fortunately, there are people like Mathijs and I who have already helped many men with flirting during our training sessions.
And there’s more good news:
Women can learn to flirt too
Do you also find flirting uncomfortable?
Fact 6: Every man watches porn
If you’re wondering if your boyfriend, boyfriend, or spouse is watching porn, here’s the answer:
most likely yes.
Why am I so sure of myself?
With a great emphasis on trying.
Lajeunesse was never able to carry out the final investigation.
He wanted to do a comparative study between men who had never watched porn and men who had done so.
But what happened?
They couldn’t find a single man who had never watched porn
Of all the twenty-somethings approached for the study , exactly 0 had never watched porn in their lives.
And if you want to say that you do know a man who has never watched porn, then there are roughly two possibilities:
or he is lying…
or he is an extreme minority.
(So it does happen that a man does not watch porn.)
Fun fact 7: He’s allergic to hard-to-get
If you’re to believe most women’s magazines with mainstream dating advice, there’s one tactic that’s guaranteed to trick any guy:
Play hard to get.
Let me get straight to the point:
this strategy doesn’t work
What most women do is play too hard to get:
Impossible to get.
They deliberately show little interest and make him wait extra long before sleeping with her.
As a result of this approach, most men will think this:
“Oh, she doesn’t like me. Never mind then.”
Because men are also afraid of rejection, they prefer not to bet everything on a woman who shows no interest.
“But Laurens, does that mean I have to make it as easy as possible for him? Men don’t like that either, do they?”
Men do like a challenge. So the trick is to be that challenge, without making it impossible for him.
Fact 8: Why men bottle their feelings up
Come closer to the screen. Then I’ll tell you a secret:
I’m no hero at parking.
Ssssht! Don’t pass it on, please!
I do not like to admit that parallel parking in my case takes a lot longer than I would like.
Parking is a real ‘ man thing’. Men ‘should’ be good at this. This is partly due to socio-cultural influences.
If you are not good at parking, then you are not ‘manly’.
And that’s exactly what men are so afraid of…
For many men, being a man is a great pressure…
As a man, you are expected to be able to do certain things.
Parking, fixing tires and lifting weights? As a man you just have to be able to do that.
After all, your fellow men claim to do all this too.
But talking about your feelings, crying a lot or making yourself vulnerable?
That is much less appreciated. And that’s exactly why men bottle up their feelings.
Many men assume that expressing emotions and feelings is not something they ‘hear’ or ‘may’ do.
As a result, many men bottle up their feelings, leading to frustration, annoyance and anger.
Fact 9: Men express their emotions differently than women
Men often bottle up their feelings. Because of this, it is assumed that women are more emotional than men.
However, this is not entirely true.
A good friend of mine found this out when she accompanied her boyfriend to a game of his favorite soccer team.
Here’s what she said about this:
“I had never seen him so happy when ‘his’ team scored a goal. He went crazy and cheered loudly. In the end they lost the game. He was very sad and couldn’t be happier.”
This is a great example of the difference between men and women when it comes to expressing emotions.
Many women find emotional release in soap operas, romantic films or conversations with friends.
Men find that release in competition and competitions . They express their emotions in a shorter, more extreme and more impulsive way than most women.
Fact 10: Men also want a relationship
If there’s a common complaint from women about men, it’s this one:
Men are only out for sex.
Well, I’m willing to admit that men are sexual beings.
(Just like most women, by the way).
But the statement that men are purely looking for sex is simply not true.
Most men who are coached by Mathijs and me eventually opt for a relationship.
Men also seek intimacy and affection.
And yes, there are many men who want a romantic relationship just as much as you do.
“But Laurens, why do I only find men who are out on a night between the sheets?”
That’s because finding the right kind of man isn’t always easy.
So it largely depends on what you’re looking for…
Fact 11: The ‘Let’s Just Be Friends’ Mistake
Have you ever had a man like you more than you like him?
And then you told him this:
“We can just stay friends.”
Then I have bad news for you:
This is not possible.
Husband and wife can’t just be friends
At least, in most cases this is not possible as you read in this article . There are, of course, ‘normal friendships’ between men and women.
Only this happens much less often.
In many friendships, a man feels a certain amount of attraction for the woman. Or vice versa.
So do you reject a man and then just stay friends? Nice try, but it’s not a good strategy.
Fact 12: Men can be jealous of this
Which is harder?
A: Making a man cum.
B: Making a woman cum
In many cases, option B applies.
Not only do men generally get aroused more easily than women, they also come more easily.
But there is this:
The female orgasm generally lasts longer and is experienced as more intense than that of men
This is apparent from this research into the female orgasm.
Unfortunately, another (disappointing) fact is that most men know quite little about female arousal.
Do you feel like you are falling short between the sheets? Would you like to talk about sex with your boyfriend or partner but you don’t know how?
Fact 13: Why He Doesn’t Want To Cuddle After Sex
Recently we received an email from a frustrated reader.
Her boyfriend fell asleep right after sex.
Very irritating. She felt the need to cuddle and chat after sex.
This is a typical difference between man and woman when it comes to sex
Research shows that women produce more oxytocin than men.
I’ll spare you the scientific explanation. In short, oxytocin makes you feel the need for more affection and cuddling after sex.
Men, on the other hand, get a boost of dopamine when ejaculating (just like women) but nothing more. The cuddle hormone is produced much less in men.
Science is not yet fully sure why that is.
It does, however, explain why the gentleman immediately turns around after sex.
But is this also a legitimate reason to immediately distance yourself after making love?
Of course not.
Should your friend or partner become distant after sex and it bothers you? Then that is also an important point to discuss.
Fact 14: Antisocial disorders are more common in men
If you’ve ever seen the Dexter series, you know what an antisocial disorder looks like.
Dexter is a murderous psychopath who finds it almost impossible to empathize with others:
Fortunately, not everyone with an antisocial disorder is a psychopath. And psychopaths aren’t always homicidal either. ( Thank God).
What is striking is that there are many more men than women with antisocial disorders such as psychopathy or autism.
Research indicates that about 3 percent of men have an antisocial disorder, compared to just 1% of women.
As a result, you see, for example, that narcissism is more common in men.
Fact 15: Depression is more common in women
Although antisocial disorders are more common in men, it seems that women are more likely to suffer from depression.
The reasons for this are complex, this research shows , ranging from a variety of genetic to biological causes.
In addition, depression manifests itself in different ways in men and women.
Research by health net shows that depressive symptoms in women translate into sadness and gloom.
In men, depression often expresses itself in frustration, annoyance or anger. This too may have to do with the different ways in which husbands and wives express their emotions.
(See tidbit #9).
Fact 16: Men talk less than women… or do they?
Women generally talk more than men. In a day, women use about 13,000 words more than men.
That men talk less than women seems to be a well-known fact about men. But… to what extent is it actually true?
Science is divided on this
For example, this research shows that man and woman both speak around 16,000 words a day.
And other research indicates that the difference in the number of words spoken depends on several things such as social setting or the topic being discussed.
In short: determining which of the sexes is the biggest chatterbox remains difficult.
Fact 17: Why you want to give him a “men’s night”
Imagine having a partner who decides everything for you.
He decides when you two see each other, he decides that you stay home and he takes away your freedoms.
Not pleasant huh?
This is the same for men. Men also have a great need for freedom.
Slightly more even than women…
I told you before that the female brain is focused on connection. That is why women generally have a greater need for contact moments with their partner than men.
There are even women who want their partner to stay at home with her, instead of him going out with his mates.
But that, dear reader, is a bad idea.
The more you take away his freedom, the more you scare him off
This is a ‘mistake’ that we see more often in women who have just met a nice man.
They are absolutely over the moon. They want to see the man in question as often as possible.
They want to meet several times a week.
And then, suddenly, Mr. becomes distant.
This is because he feels that one of his highest values, his freedom , is being taken away.
Since many men find it difficult to express their feelings clearly, he chooses to disappear from the radar in one go.
(As happens with ghosting ).
Is this neat? New.
But it is an important lesson for many women.
The more space you give a man, the better he will feel with you.
Fact 18: Men are like hedgehogs
Let’s take a look at a scene from one of my favorite childhood movies:
Nala and Simba have a fight.
Nala confronts Simba on a specific point, but Simba refuses to agree.
At some point, emotions run high. Simba gets angry and runs away.
Does this seem somewhat familiar to you?
Men tend to run away from a confrontation or argument
Like a hedgehog they put up their spines and run into their burrow.
This phenomenon of “crawling into the hole” is discussed at length in Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus (John Gray).
Because men can’t handle the emotional overload that conflict produces, they run away from it.
They go into their ‘den’ and they don’t want to be disturbed for a while.
For women, this feels very frustrating. She wants to end the fight .
The result is that the dear wife goes after the man and wants to continue the conflict.
But this only backfires.
Men need time to retreat. It is the masculine way of processing emotions.
Once he emerges from the hole, he will have more energy and space in his head to discuss the conflict with you.
Fact 19: Men are extremely competitive because of testosterone
Ever seen how an average man goes completely crazy when losing a game of FIFA on the playstation?
If not, you can see it here:
(Warning: shocking images and excessive affectation).
It’s a telling (and very painful) example of male competitiveness.
In fact 3 I already told you about the great importance men attach to hierarchy. This is partly due to the strong competitiveness.
However, there is also another factor…
Men make more testosterone than women
Fortunately, because otherwise many women would now be walking around with a beard.
Maybe you would have liked to have a beard too… but hey, let’s move on.
Research shows that high levels of testosterone provide a stronger competition drive.
So should you hear your friend flip from the living room when his football club is behind?
Forgive him. It’s all that damn testosterone.
Fact 20: The male brain works very differently than the female brain
Male or female: we both have brains.
(At least, most of us).
Nevertheless, those brains are by no means the same.
Some brain functions work differently in men than in women
Although our brains are similar, the two sexes use different brain regions to perform the same task.
Those small differences between the two brains can have big consequences, according to Professor Louann Brizendine (author of The Male Brain ).
A man’s brain area for sexual drive is about 2.5 times the size of a woman’s.
The result is that men often and a lot think about sex. Day and night. He has little influence on this.
This makes it easy to think that he is only out for sex…
Infatuation with men can also be more intense than with women
This happens when the brain activity for lust and love are both strongly activated.
His ‘solution-oriented’ male brain is suddenly completely devoted to one ‘problem’ that needs to be solved:
how does he make sure that his lover likes him too?
So once you know how the male brain works, you have the knowledge to make a man head over heels in love with you.
- How Men Think: 6 Steps to a Man’s Mind
- Top 5 Surprising Reasons Why Men Cheat
- 15 Surprising Reasons Why Men Don’t Listen
- 11 Unexpected Things That Make Men Insecure
- What do men want? The 14 things he looks for in you (Yup, you there)