As humans, we are programmed in such a way that we can give all signals, stimuli, behaviours, gestures and objects a place. If we didn’t do that, a day would be impossible to sustain. Then you would think about everything and see four legs and a top separately instead of calling it a table.
When the traffic light turns green you know you can cross the road and when an ambulance rushes by with sirens you know why without thinking deeply. A group of youths sitting with cans of beer in a playground might classify you as loitering and a person with an unwashed face, messy beard and old clothes you might consider a bum.
Boxing often happens automatically and can be very functional. But are there also moments when you can let go of arranging to be absorbed in the moment?
Box thinking influences your worldview
In many situations it is effective to classify the world around you. The question is whether everything should be pigeonholed. It can provide support for fear: ‘I don’t trust women with burkas.
‘ Closing doors: ‘I’m just a loner, that’s why I can’t make friends.’ Or make the beautiful things in life fade: ‘The Netherlands is always gray and drab.’ and “I’d love to wear swimwear, but I really can’t with my figure.”
Boxing affects how you see the world and how you see yourself . That unique individual full of potential, love, decisiveness and humor? Are you letting that flow or is your thought pattern holding it back?
When a child is just born, everything is new and impressive. With all his attention, a newborn looks at his mother’s face a few centimeters away. After a while, the baby marvels at patterns and shapes half a meter away, which his field of view can now discern.
And with his utmost concentration, the baby discovers a little later a button on his sweater or that his feet are moving. Once we were just spectators. And that uniqueness has not been lost. The trick is to use your potential and see the world instead of coloring it in. Convert fears into wonder and open doors to give your life more joy, so that the world is seen instead of interpreted.
3 tips to see
- Do not identify with events around you. You are not the event, only your reaction to it takes place and you can adjust it. When you receive a rejection on a job application, you have not been rejected as a person, but because of your experience in that field. It says nothing about who you are and what qualities you possess, it says something about the choice a company makes to choose another candidate, regardless of whether that choice is based on equality and transparency. As soon as you disconnect situations from you as a person, you can also view the circumstances.
- Don’t let your emotions take over. If your child cries continuously when going to bed and you react from your anger or irritation, you are no longer a spectator. You follow your emotions and cannot look objectively at what is going on. You classify your child as a difficult sleeper and with that the world is colored and your emotions have won. So: acknowledge your emotions, accept them and you will see them become less intense.
- Lower your expectations. Expectations are images of a future that does not exist in the present. If you expect something from another person or a situation, you already fill in a future moment according to your wishes. What are the chances that things will turn out differently and you will be disappointed? Stay in the present and leave spontaneity for the future.
See the world from the inside instead of the outside
In daily life I come into contact with many cultures. And every time I am amazed when my interpretations are destroyed and my boxes are blown over. By women with headscarves who speak most in front of their husbands or by war refugees who do not consider freedom as their most important value, but respect for others does.
And recently I told a group of Syrian newcomers that I was indignant that a new neighbor did not introduce himself in the street. I got questioning faces. In their culture you go to the new neighbor to welcome him and certainly not the other way around.
Trying to see the world every now and then is a good learning experience and sometimes unexpectedly entails beautiful experiences.