Outwardly, you can live a fulfilling life with a successful study, a good job, a relationship, children and friends. Especially if you can do a lot in your life on your intelligence or mental strength. If you are highly sensitive you can eventually get stuck with it.
You often feel somewhere that you are not completely complete or happy. You live for half or maintain a facade. Sometimes life situations severely affect your inner self and you then discover that a part of yourself has still been underexposed.
Sexual abuse is not only about sexuality, but also about power and abuse of power. Your own will is broken to your soul. Normal identity development can be severely disrupted. As a result, you can have problems with feeling boundaries and also dare or be able to clearly indicate them.
With this request for help or complaint, women often go to psychotherapy or to a psychologist. Mainly because they tend to attract partners who go beyond their limits.
Psychology or psychotherapy can offer a lot of help in strengthening your self-image and your I-power and this is necessary for a while . Energetically speaking, especially themes related to the third chakra can heal with this.
More layers of your being have been touched by sexual abuse and you have been damaged to your soul because of this. All these other layers also require healing. By this I mean the ethereal and spiritual layers of your aura that are generally not or hardly touched in regular care.
Healing after sexual abuse proceeds layer by layer at its own time and pace. Sometimes it takes years before you get to another layer. And each layer requires a different form of healing.
To survive sexual abuse you have learned survival strategies to a greater or lesser extent. A common strategy is to dissociate. Dissociation can be compared to a form of disengagement in which you temporarily leave your body so as not to immediately feel pain, sadness or fear. Depending on experiences that brought you into this life, you are or become fragmented as a result. Energetically, your aura has holes. You are not (anymore) complete and whole.
You have become adept at disconnecting your being from your body and from your emotions when you feel threatened. This will have consequences for the rest of your life if you continue to use this strategy. What once was your survival can actually get in the way of life as an adult.
Working on restoring the connection between your being, your body and your emotions is important to literally become whole again. Due to dissociation, your body is not (any longer) completely inhabited. In parts of your body where you are essentially not present, other things can grow or take place physically over time. This can harm your health. Learning to inhabit your body again from hair tips to soles of the feet is quite a challenge. And you generally don’t do that through a therapy that focuses only on talking.
Often women also develop an aggression towards their own femininity. They struggle with guilt and shame after sexual abuse. They may also struggle with their femininity or their sexuality. This can cause all kinds of problems in the field of sexuality and sexuality development, health problems in the female organs and it can take a lot of effort to form an adult emotional connection with partners.
In addition, your body has often been in a flight position, which has overloaded your sympathetic nervous system. The tensions created by this must be relieved. If that tension cannot be discharged to the outside (for example because you really started running or fighting or crying), this energy accumulates in your body and can lead to chronic tension or fatigue. Being able to discharge, rest and relax is vital for your health.
Energetically speaking, the first and second chakras are damaged, which can lead to physical complaints. Working on healing themes related to these chakras is a layer of healing that ensures that you can (re)connect with the ground under your feet, feel your right to exist and celebrate your femininity.
spiritual healing (transformation)
Your spiritual development is all about finding answers to questions like: Why am I here? What is my task in this life? When you are dealing with these questions, you want more in life than just collecting as much matter as possible. You seek the meaning of life.
You may come to a point where you may wonder how all of your experiences can help you or help others. Wearing a lead coat and staying upright with it has also given you an enormous carrying capacity. You can also use this power for a constructive life. For this you arrive at layers that concern your heart and the heart chakra and at higher chakras.
Feeling unconditional love for others is one of the great lessons of being human. For that you need an open heart towards everyone. The most difficult layer of healing that I have experienced myself is transforming my experiences into love. First unconditional love for myself and later also for the other.
Healing feelings of hatred and resentment, destructive thoughts, feelings and actions towards myself and towards others has taken many years. My drive in these difficult years was that I felt deep within myself that I could feel better than this, that I could feel happier than this, that life could be different from the circle in which I kept spinning. By continuing to search, I paved the way for myself to let people and events come my way that helped me further.
A wise teacher once told me that traumatic experiences can also be seen as initiations into the new age in the development of a higher consciousness.
I can totally feel that there is a kernel of truth in this for me. That I dare to say that thanks to my traumas I have become who I am today. I couldn’t prevent it from being done to me, but I did make my choice how to deal with it.
I would like to say to the women (and men) who recognize themselves in this article to continue searching for healing. To invite people and events in your path to help you with this. Your life path and your quest can then be a beacon of light for others.