Imagine if your fear is actually your intuition telling you that something is wrong?

Imagine if your fear is actually your intuition telling you that something is wrong?

One of the questions I get most often is this: “How do I know if the fear I’m feeling is fear and not my intuition warning me of a real problem?” It is the meta-question of all recurring questions, and because the question is so persistent, a person is less likely to focus on his or her inner work. Sub questions include:

“What if there’s something really wrong with my relationship and I’m ignoring the real problem by labeling those fears as something in my head?” or “What if there’s something really wrong with my health and I’m ignoring the real problem by labeling those fears as something in my head?”


The ability to distinguish between a real problem and fear depends on your self-confidence. Confidence is the calm, clear, grounded place within you that is connected to your wisdom. Your confidence tells you much more than just whether something is ‘right’ or ‘wrong’. It doesn’t tell you what you ‘should do’. It ignores what you should be doing and it doesn’t listen to what your parents or your peers think or what society approves of. You are the only one who has access to it. Self-confidence is your knowledge, your wisdom, and your voice.

Imagine if your fear is actually your intuition telling you that something is wrong?

It is also your birthright. It is the crystal compass at the center of your being that has existed since you were born. It’s the part of you that always knew when you were hungry or needed to be close to your caregivers, who liked you, and what you needed. It is an essential part of yourself and by regaining your lost confidence you can navigate through life confidently and without ambiguities.

Self-confidence is also closely related to self-knowledge because it is only when you know yourself that you begin to love yourself. You really get to know yourself only by spending time in your internal labyrinth with the headlight of your curiosity on your forehead, turning over rocks and exploring not only the dark but also the beautifully lit places. Below is the comparison:

Self-knowledge + self-love = self-confidence

Get to know the subtle differences between fear and intuition

Imagine if your fear is actually your intuition telling you that something is wrong?

When you know yourself, you can see the subtle but clear difference between your fear and your intuition. By traversing your inner terrain, you learn your reactions and the subtle differences between fear and intuition, all of which lead to confidence in yourself. This is one of the biggest challenges in fear processing; fear and intuition can sound and feel almost exactly the same. It is the muscle of your confidence that differentiates between the two.

I will give an example of what this muscle looks like:

My boys are playing outside in the snow. My husband comes in from his studio, looks out the window, and asks, ‘Where are the boys? I don’t see them there. Maybe they’re by the river.’ My fear, which is often the first to show itself, paints a picture of them being attacked and eaten by the bear that has roamed our property for the past few months.

This is my inherited fear, the nerves of which are amplified by the fact that I am a highly sensitive person (extra vigilant for danger) and by my ancestral habits that have been passed down through generations. There’s my grandmother, her lips tight with concern. There’s my mom, imagining the worst-case scenarios with her kids. And it’s not hard to believe that my great-great-grandmother was deeply concerned about the survival of her children.

My ancestors had good reasons to be concerned, and so should yours. It is essential here to remember that only recently humanity has been living in an environment that is safer than it used to be and that our bodies are now less likely to get sick (and if we do get sick, medicine is in both the East and the West). the west so far advanced that we can be helped). For thousands of years, fears in man that warn him of real danger have had a positive effect on evolution. But since it’s quite rare, especially in certain parts of the world, to find yourself in a life-threatening situation now, your fear is increasingly trying to turn something into a catastrophe.

Imagine if your fear is actually your intuition telling you that something is wrong?

So, back to the bear… If I give voice to the fear and say something out loud to my husband, such as ‘Do you think they will be torn apart by a bear?’ I am only feeding my fear, which will then grow through the attention I pay to it. But if I listen closely, I can sense that this thought is a story that my head is telling me. My fear feels superficial like it’s only between my ears. It doesn’t feel solid or real. Somehow I know my boys won’t be beaten by a bear. So I say nothing.

Then my husband says, “Oh, there they are. They play among the poplars. Do you think that’s safe?’ Immediately I feel something pressing against my chest and I can already see exactly how the heavy branches are now even heavier because of the layers of snow on them. Without thinking too much and trusting my intuition, I say, “That’s probably not the best idea. Can you ask them not to play there when you go out again?’ Fear feels familiar and disturbing, but if I focus on it even for a moment, I feel it doesn’t make sense. True intuition is grounded and clear. It’s a knowing I can trust.

Again, this is a subtle difference that I have come to realize after decades of research, and have been healed of the insecurity I felt for the first half of my life. This is the same place that fueled my perfectionism, made other people’s opinions matter to me, and got me hooked on approval. I was able to let go of my fears. With the right mindset and tools, you can heal from your insecurity and replace it with confidence. That confidence is your birthright, your compass, and your happiness.


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