You have been dating for a while, or even in a relationship.
Still, he needs some space. He has to think. Do you really fit together?
It sounds contradictory. Because if you like someone, giving them space is the last thing you want to do.
Still, it’s good to take that step back.
Leave a man alone or By leaving him alone for a while, you can ensure that he eventually becomes crazy about you and never wants to be without you again.
How does that work? You’ll know that after reading this article, because I’ll give you 10 tips to get him to love you and explain how leaving him alone can help.
Tip 1: Go slower than him
You may think: I am already convinced that he is my dream man.
I have to take the initiative and show that I want to go for him. Then it will follow automatically!
But nothing is less true.
You don’t want to seem desperate. You don’t want him to get stuffy.
You want him to take initiative towards you!
And shall I tell you a secret? He secretly wants that too.
Of course you should let him know that you are interested. But by giving him space and leaving him alone for a while, he will eventually come after you .
You become more desirable. Good for you, because you feel beautiful, wanted, loved and attractive.
And good for him. For there is nothing more masculine for a man than to go after a woman and conquer her.
Just let him come to you. If he really wants you, he will come.
Tip 2: Up-dating instead of down-dating
We take things for granted that just happen.
But really appreciate something? You only do that if you have to put in the effort.
So the problem when he finds that he doesn’t have to put in much effort… that you even want to go faster than him, or invest more than him…
is that he automatically values you less. Unfortunately, that’s how the human brain works.
In fact, he gets the feeling that he ‘s dating . Date someone who is ‘below his level’.
Imagine that you are interested in a man, but he suddenly wants to go super fast. And show that he loves you all the way over the top.
Then you will automatically get a gut feeling that he is not worthy of you. That you can get better.
Updating is much more fun. Dating someone who is on the same level, or even slightly above it. You have to put in some effort. You appreciate it extra.
Boredom quickly sets in when down-dating, but up-dating keeps you curious. You keep stimulating each other, you challenge each other.
You keep it interesting.
And then he will come back to you on his own.
Tip 3: Make him fall in love
We’ve all been in love at one time or another. But do you know how falling in love really works?
Infatuation means that someone has something you are looking for, what you want.
But only when you are unsure whether you can get (or keep) that person, do feelings of falling in love arise.
The other one is hard to get . And that makes him 10x more attractive.
Obviousness quickly becomes boring. But inaccessibility is intriguing!
Make yourself more attractive by not being self-evident.
Show that you are worth fighting for.
Tip 4: Give him freedom
Do you know what’s at the top of the list of ‘unappealing characteristics of women‘? (And vice versa just as well.)
I’ll tell you.
There is nothing more unattractive than a woman who claims. It makes a man feel stuffy. As if he has lost his freedom.
Freedom and autonomy are important to every person, but for men this is almost even more important than for women.
A man needs air. Space to make his own choices, to organize his own life.
Do you make him feel like you’re taking away his freedom? That he cannot be autonomous?
Believe me, dear reader, you are repelling it, not attracting it.
Attraction sometimes needs the opposite. To attract each other, you have to give each other space.
Tip 5: Don’t ask for anything, but give a lot
Does he want to be left alone for a while?
Then you can do two things:
- On the contrary, you can stay close to him a lot, not leave him alone and be constantly present to convince him that you are really nice.
- Or you can do what he needs: leave him alone.
Which of the two do you think works best?
Leave him alone, of course. That works the best!
Don’t pressure him, that will only backfire.
Make sure that when you do let yourself be heard, it is also something fun.
For example, occasionally send a flirty message to trigger him. Send a funny photo of something you’re doing right now, without necessarily looking for a conversation.
Just let them know that you’re having a good time without going out of your way to reach out to him.
Keep the positive stimulus you send to him non-committal.
In fact, don’t send anything at all besides the photo.
Does he respond? Then wait a while before responding.
That’s how you make him think. “Does she still like me?”
Before you know it, he realizes he doesn’t want to be without you at all.
Tip 6: Show him how nice your life is, even without him
Of course you love him.
It feels like the world revolves around him.
But the world also keeps spinning when you’re not working with it. Really and truly!
Show him that you are moving on with your life. Do not sit and wait desperately, but make the most of this period.
Do fun things with friends, go out, have fun.
Show that you can have a great time without him and make sure he sees that too. Desperate women are not necessarily attractive, but women who are confident and having fun are!
Post some pictures on social media, so he can see that you have a wonderful life without him.
He starts to think: “That life looks good. I want to be part of that!”
And that’s how you put it on without putting pressure on it.
Tip 7: How long should I give him time? Do not wait too long!
Of course you have to respect that he needs space. And of course you have to give him that space too.
But you don’t have to put your life on hold for him for months.
Don’t sit and wait for him.
Get on with your life.
Life doesn’t revolve around him.
It’s YOUR LIFE . You are in control of how you fill your days.
Sure, you can wait a few weeks.
But is he really leading you on? Then continue.
Move on, girl!
You are worth finding a man who dares to take the plunge. A man who dares to invest in you. A man who dares to choose you.
Tip 8: Leave a man with fear of commitment alone
Does he want you to leave him alone?
Then of course you do.
But why does he want you to leave him alone?
Is he just having doubts about you as a couple? Is he afraid to make a decision because he’s afraid he’ll miss out on other beautiful things in life if he chooses you? Or maybe he suffers from fear of commitment?
Fear of commitment is a killer, but it is not a choice.
No one consciously chooses fear. Fear blocks beautiful things. Nobody wants that.
When he suffers from fear of commitment, it is important to understand that he will not dare to commit because he is afraid that you will eventually leave him.
He won’t let you get close for fear of getting hurt.
Commitment anxiety is something you can’t fix for him.
If he really wants something with it, he’ll have to do something with it. For example in the form of therapy.
Until then, you have to think about what you want.
Are you waiting for him? Will you give him even more space until he’s ready?
Or will you continue?
Only you can determine if it’s worth waiting for. But keep one thing in mind: you don’t have to put your life on hold for him.
It’s okay to continue.
Tip 9: If a man doesn’t know what he wants: set limits
Does he want to slow down a bit? Fine.
Sometimes it’s good for a man to step on the brakes. You may be stepping on the accelerator too hard.
But there is also such a thing as ‘too slow’. An old car that slows down will eventually come to a stop. Is that what you want?
A relationship without any progression is like that old car. Eventually he stops. The car is still there, but there is no movement in it.
That’s exactly what happens when you get stuck at the same point in your relationship.
He’s leading you on because he doesn’t know what he wants.
Of course you can. He’s only human too. But you deserve a man who will go all out for you. And that’s why you can set your boundaries!
You can’t always wait for him, no matter how nice he is.
Tip 10: Leave a man alone He needs time to think
We’ve said it before: he deserves time to think. He is entitled to that.
But hey, he’s not the boss! In a relationship, there are always two people who both have a say in what happens.
Is the ball completely in his court and are you just waiting for him to take the initiative again?
Then set a deadline.
Indicate that you respect that he needs space, but that you also need perspective.
You want to know if you are waiting for anything at all, or if you are wasting your time.
Put some healthy pressure behind it, without stuffing him. Say, for example, that you want to know definitively in a month whether he wants to continue with you.
This way you force him to think about it calmly and finally make a decision.
Does something seem to be bothering him? Then he has that month to declare that, so that you can talk about it together.
Isn’t he doing this? Then you know enough.
Life is too short to wait forever.
And that, dear reader, is what I want to give you as a conclusion.
Life is short. Too short to wait months for someone who doesn’t want to go 100% for you.
Because someone who goes 100% for you will only be happy to know that he is with you.
Isn’t that this man? Then there really is another man walking around who does go for you.
You can read more about it in this article: Finding, meeting & attracting a nice man .
I give you the love of your life!
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