The vulnerable child
For many of you, the vulnerable child is recognizable. We all know about not being seen, understood and heard as a child. The pain of loneliness or dealing with oppression as a child leaves its mark. It is part of our spiritual process to face and heal that pain.
As a child you may also remember the beautiful moments. Wonder or an experience that has made a deep positive impression. Bright spots that gave you the feeling that there is more than just earthly life. That you were lifted up for a moment and realized that you are part of a greater whole.On the other hand, the darkness may have been so overwhelming that you don’t remember any bright spots.
The child in you is still there. It makes itself felt and seen in your relationships with people. It can feel lonely and sad when there is no care and attention. Usually we project that onto the other in the hope of still getting the love we have missed so much. This leads to conflict, struggle and disappointment.
Making the move inward is not always as easy as it seems. Sitting down with yourself can cause so much anxiety that you don’t even start. You get even more in your head and don’t know how to keep in touch with your body and to feel. You may also start to feel a lot and become overwhelmed by your emotions. It starts with accepting the way it is now. Paying attention and being aware of what you feel or don’t feel. It’s both good. One has easier access to his or her emotions while the other is more sensitive and can make refined and energetic contact.
The child in you is not just the playful, magical or vulnerable child. There is also a sphere in you that is connected to the baby in you when you came to earth and it is still connected to the spiritual world. An atmosphere where harmony, silence and love reign.
In the spiritual world they speak of a child’s sphere. That is an atmosphere in which only highly attuned love spirits may be, who take care of these children. Children who have already left the earth at a younger age go here and develop further there, according to Jozef Rulof . If you want to make contact with the most young baby in you, it requires a sacred and silent approach, just like what happens in the spheres. From love and respect you descend into yourself so that this sphere of love can open up.
How can you connect with your inner child?
1. Be aware. Be aware of your thoughts, feelings, body and energy. What do you feel, what do you think, what do you perceive? Who observes? You can do this for a few minutes or longer if you like.
2. Create a nice, sacred place where you make time for yourself every day. Arrange it so that you feel comfortable in it and that it is inviting to enter. Use candles, incense, a figurine or image that is valuable to you.
3. Take a walk in nature, the park and take the time to stand still. Listen to the sounds and listen to the silence. See the beauty around you and how it resonates with the beauty and stillness within you.
4. Writing can be a good way to connect with what you are experiencing. You can ask your child directly inward how she/he is feeling. A photo from your childhood can help you visualize the child you were. Listen and be open to what you hear. If the child is scared in a corner and doesn’t want to talk, accept that and look at it gently. Perhaps your child is angry because you have not paid attention to it for a long time.
5. Connect with your inner child. Tune in to what you feel and experience. Pay attention to tensions, restlessness and feelings that are there. How does it feel inside? Now imagine that your feeling is a certain child in you that demands attention and love. See it for you. Approach it gently, with care and love. Ask the child what it needs from you.
6. Go to a place where there are children. A petting zoo, a playground, park and look at those children from small to large. What does it do to you? Take the time to experience and be thankful for these children.
Meditation and the inner child are an extension of each other. They support each other. They both aim to restore contact with yourself, to be aware of who you are deep down. I personally prefer two different forms of meditation. The first is Buddhist meditation. You create a nice quiet place where you can sit undisturbed for half an hour or more. I prefer a meditation cushion or a meditation bench to sit on.
You can also take a chair if that is comfortable. A good comfortable position with your back straight and your chin pulled in slightly and your eyes open, looking inward. Rest your hands on your thighs and keep your arms and shoulders relaxed. Relax your face and jaw. Relax your tongue with the tip resting against your teeth. Focus your attention on your breathing and always come back to your breathing in a friendly and relaxed way. Start with five to ten minutes of sitting and slowly increase to half an hour or more. Over time, you can turn your attention to a particular theme such as love, forgiveness, generosity, gratitude.
The inner child is connected to your soul . Our inner children are good at being . They carry within them sensitivity, fears and our magic. When we lose this contact, we also lose the mysterious, the magical, the intimacy and the fun in our relationships and life. All in all, a good reason to get to know and connect with our inner children.
When I tune in to my inner children, I sit in a relaxed way on the couch or in an easy chair. I make sure that I am sitting correctly and focus on my breathing for a moment and scan my body (letting attention go through your body). I feel where I am tense or relaxed and experience my feelings, without anything having to be changed. It may just be there.
I close my eyes. Focus my attention on the silence or the sounds around me and slowly go more inward. I focus my attention on my feelings and connect with them. There may be images that are connected to one of your inner children. You can also visualize and see yourself as a child of a certain age. Take it easy and don’t expect anything. The softer you are, the easier the children will show and feel. Just listen and feel. You may feel sadness or fear or anger. Feel it and stay with it in softness and warmth. Maybe you feel joy, joy. Allow it and experience it.
To become more attuned to the inner children, I focus my attention on the neck energy. You bring your attention to your neck, back of your head. You may not feel anything or you may experience tension. Just imagine it. From your neck you can briefly move your attention to your heart center. That’s a point in the middle of your chest. Take the love and warmth you feel there inside and focus again on your feelings and your inner children.
It is important that you do not have an agenda. I mean, an expectation of how it should or should be. If you don’t experience anything, that’s fine too. Open up and wait. The child needs trust that you will stick with him or her and not let them down again. She waits quietly until you are ready.
When I write like this, I get moved and feel how my children react. I think they agree with me how nice it is that they are allowed to be there and that attention is paid to them. I also feel emotion and gratitude because the way in and the contact with my inner children has opened me to the magic and mystery of life.