A warning light comes on on the dashboard, the engine makes a gurgling sound. “You’ve filled up with diesel, haven’t you?” I ask unsuspectingly. Oh oh, not so. Quickly pull over at the nearest gas station. We are at that time in Spain, more than 200 km from our destination.
“Trials are situations that life gives us to practice and embody what we have realized.” adyashanti
Live life consciously
Since my burnout, my life has been dominated by awareness, transformation, and personal growth. I devour one spiritual book after another and in turn inspire others. ‘ Practice what you preach ‘ is an absolute precondition for authenticity. Consciously going through life when life is quietly rippling is one thing. Living with trust and surrender during trials, that’s another pair of sleeves.
“As soon as disaster strikes, as soon as trouble comes, you lose all that has been given to you, because it is not deeply rooted and embodied in you . ” adyashanti
My conditioned, alias unconscious or ego-driven reaction, would have looked something like this. Blaming my boyfriend for filling up with the wrong fuel, seeing myself as a victim of the situation, labeling life hostile, despairing, thinking negatively, and letting the fear—that this event cost me all my savings—dominate.
“Staying focused on the spark of divinity within ourselves is not always easy and to act on it sometimes takes a lot of courage and confidence . ” adyashanti
Although I was certainly (and several times) tempted to react from my ego during this situation, I saw it mainly as a challenge to actually apply the wisdom I have taken in the past few months. Looking back, my conscious response to this ordeal contained five elements:
1. Connecting with the silence in myself
As I waited for the tow truck, I connected with the silence within myself. Personally, I call this meditation, you could also call it a form of prayer. By making it quiet within myself, I consciously make the connection with a greater whole, whether you want to call it God, the Universe or the collective field.
During this meditation, I set the intention for the best possible outcome from this situation, no matter what it might be. Then I let go of this intention in confidence.
2. Focus on gratitude
A second element I consciously practiced was focusing on gratitude. With my presence I turned my attention to what I was grateful for in this situation: the happiness of having taken out social assistance insurance that also arranges everything for me abroad (towing service, taxi to the destination…), the freedom that having a car gives me, the warning light that alerted us, the realization that it could all have been much worse, etc.
3. Staying in the here and now
There were 48 hours between towing the car and receiving the verdict or damage diagnosis. Whenever I noticed my anxious thoughts starting to take over, I brought myself back to the here-and-now. Fortunately, the message from Eckhart Tolle’s book ‘The power of the NOW in practice’ was still fresh in my memory. That is, ‘ now, at this very moment, there is never a problem ‘. I created a problem myself by believing my fearful thoughts, but as soon as I stopped doing that and focused on the now, the problem was gone.
4. Looking for the hidden lesson or blessing
Meanwhile, I know that in life nothing happens for nothing. I also trust that life is on my side and is a friend and not a fun-wasting bogeyman. This realization made me look for the hidden lesson in this situation. If I had been home, I would have consulted Christiane Beerlandt’s signal books, but since I didn’t have them at hand now, I searched within myself for answers. Funnily enough, I ended up with an old pattern of control and dependence within relationships and in addition, I was allowed to peel off another layer of limiting money beliefs. Then I was able to focus even more on gratitude because this situation had uncovered old clutter that I could then transform.
5. No attachment to the story
One of Access Consciousness’s ten keys to total freedom reads: ‘Don’t listen to, tell or buy the story’. The meaning of this key became clear to me through this situation. In fact, all my life I have heard through various channels “If gasoline goes through a diesel engine, your car is ruined”. Well, that didn’t seem like the “best possible outcome” I had asked for, so I decided to give as little attention to that existing story as possible. I did everything I could not add any extra drama to the situation. So I didn’t call anyone to tell my story nor did I search the internet.
Recently I read somewhere that if something negative happens to you and you don’t tell anyone, it disappears on its own. Actually, I can confirm this: the situation did not disappear, but it took up less and less space in my thinking. During that 48-hour wait I was actually able to relax, something I would never have been able to do in the past.
‘Being able to act from the silence of the truth without any fear at the critical moments’ is what consciously responding to trials is about.