That opening in that depth is important because it is precisely at that point that our old convictions and experiences want to stand for it: ‘That love is never there anyway’, says something in you. Or, “I can’t.” Or: ‘I can trust nothing and no one.’ For example, there are still many strong beliefs that we are often not aware of, which in fact keep us trapped in old experiences.
On some level, those beliefs are generally true. Yes, that love wasn’t there when you needed it so much. Yes, you couldn’t and yes, you could never rely on anyone or anything. But, do you notice…?! That is essentially about the past! And in addition, in this experience, you can always feel emotional dependence on other people. The dimension of being – the key – is missing!
Open your heart
Love is essentially a Universal Presence. It is the core and the beginning of life, even if you may not experience it that way. Love is all around you!
It was as a child that you depended on your parents and on the people around you for your survival and for your sense of right to exist as a human being! As an adult, however, you are able to push your limits and get your – spiritual – nourishment and support from another source. Namely from the dimension of being from which you can open your heart in love to the still imperfect and needy in you. With that, you go through that door in your heart and you can experience what you already receive the moment you ask.
When you – perhaps with the help of another who knows the strength of the heart – dare to descend into your own hell, you may encounter languishing and essentially very needy part of yourself. You can then look for a culprit, a solution, or an explanation, but that doesn’t really help. Only when you dare to open your heart to that pain, that loneliness, or that sadness in you, do you come close to real healing.
The moment when the deepest need is finally felt is actually already the moment of fulfillment and of healing. So what you really need is already there. Here and now. The only condition is that you descend to the deepest layer of your inner need and dare to open there.
Exercise: receiving what you really need
Close your eyes and relax your face. Breathe in and out deeply for a while and sigh a few times. Then let your breath become still, become more subtle. Smile at yourself and allow that smile to descend to your heart. Open your heart to yourself. Open your heart to your gut, no matter how you feel right now.
What is it craves in you?! (Perhaps what you seek is represented by a person or possession. Then go beyond that person or possession until you feel what it is; descend to the core, the essence of your need, beyond the form or person.) Rejoice that you may actually receive.
Now imagine an angel associated with the great Omnipotence. This Enger is all there for you now to give you exactly what you need… Allow yourself to be helped, nurtured, comforted, and loved. Perceive what it is that you receive. Experience how you are, stand, look and feel when you have received what you really need at this moment.