Are you aware of how important you are in your child’s life? And are you aware of how important your child is in your life?
And why is your child your child anyway? And does your child have you as a parent?
From my vision of life you can assume that parent and child are together for a reason. The word coincidence does not exist in my life, everything happens for a reason. So the fact that you are together is partly because you have a lot to learn from each other. For me parent and child are the same.
As far as I’m concerned, our children are the best teachers there can be in your life. In fact, when we look at our child, we are looking in the mirror, as it were. You probably know that you are an example for your child at all times. What you show your children imitate. For example, in the way you react, deal with conflicts, whether or not you come into contact with another person, life is positive or negative, etc. What we show we live for our child and our child thinks (unconsciously): like this : hear it!
How the mirror works
But the mirror only really works what children see and feel when it comes to our inner world. Our children, especially young children, communicate with us through feeling. They are so connected to it that they can empathize in a way that we feel as parents too. They may not always understand the meaning of words, but they do feel the emotional charge associated with these words.
For example, children can sometimes pick up on your grief as a parent while you think: I didn’t tell my child that at all. No, because that is not necessary, your child often already knows. That is why it is good to confirm your child at a child level when he asks: daddy are you okay? Or: Mom are you sad? Because we often do not want to burden our child with our problems, we tend to say: oh no, there is nothing. This can be so confusing that the child unconsciously learns that they cannot rely on their intuition.
In life we all experience things that are not always fun and those are our so-called life lessons. Our child also lends a hand in this by making something clear to you with his / her behavior. And your child does this by showing behavior that you experience as difficult. Because if you experience something as difficult, it touches something inside. And if something touches you, it also says something about you. If you are not aware of this, you will clash with your child.
If your child mirrors you, it subconsciously senses that you are allowed to do something as a parent. For example: do you find it difficult that your child shows fear of failure? Then feel for yourself how you deal with moments when you feel like you are failing. Or do you find it difficult that your child is not strong? How powerful are you in life? Or is your child not listening to you?
How well do you listen to yourself?
The mirror has a strong and profound effect and tells you a lot about hurt or unfinished childhood experiences that your child subconsciously feels that the time has come for you to look at them and to heal or resolve these moments. Recognizing your feelings, which are hidden in your blind spot, is often enough.
receive your child
So you can learn a lot from your child if you are aware of it and open to learn from your child. Sometimes that can be quite difficult, because your child flawlessly puts the finger on the sore spot. And if we don’t understand our children in that because we can think: you’re hurting me, stop it! Then we fend off our children or even punish them because we find them ill-mannered or too rude. But what good could happen to you and between you if you understand what your child’s message is?