3 Tips To Reduce Suspicion (In Relationships)

Reasons He's Jealous

Being suspicious is a very difficult quality, both for yourself and those around you. The opposite of suspicion is self-confidence.

Are you very suspicious? Are you looking for something behind everything? Are you jealous and suspicious of your partner, children, friends and family?

I understand all too well that you lose your distrust of others. That is exactly what you will learn in this article.

Purpose of this article: It is not always easy to recognize suspicion. I’m going to explain to you what suspicion is, How suspicion manifests itself in a relationship and I’ll give you 3 tips to reduce suspicion.

Does distrust and suspicion rule your life and do you want to tackle this directly to the core with the help of a professional? 

When are you suspicious?

“ My sister-in-law sent me a curt WhatsApp message last week. I didn’t quite understand this. But when she gave me a weird smile on my brother’s birthday, I knew for sure. My sister-in-law hates me .”

“ Last time I became nauseous from the medicine that the doctor prescribed me. Now I don’t feel well again. I think the doctor is trying to make me sick .”

Suspicion is that you search further behind an event and/or the behavior of others.

Woman looking through a magnifying glass towards the camera

You often look further than is necessary or appropriate in the situation. To the point of exaggeration. Suspicion often comes from a deeper sense of insufficient self-confidence.

A certain amount of suspicion is healthy. Then you are not naive, but critical of people and events. Too much suspicion can cause problems. Then you get gripped by  fear .

You don’t really trust anyone anymore. Your  social contacts will suffer more and more.

You become more and more insecure and avoid contact with other people more and more. You question every other person’s look and every kind gesture. You look for something behind everything.

You increasingly think that others cannot be trusted. You also see more and more things as dangerous and unsafe. Do you recognize the following thoughts?

  • The world is no longer safe
  • I don’t trust him/her.
  • Why do people keep looking at me?
  • They talk behind my back.
  • Something isn’t right about me.

This is not a healthy way of thinking, don’t you think?

Suspicious man looking at another man

Being suspicious in a relationship

Suspicion in a relationship is like a tumor. It starts small and unrecognizable. You may not even know that suspicion kicks in. But the suspicion quickly spreads after that. It can quickly deteriorate and even destroy the relationship between two people.

Suspicion can be taught, just like self-confidence can be taught. Suspicion does not just pop up, but is often the result of an event in your life.

But realize that being paranoid and insecure in a relationship is a problem that needs to be addressed and solved.

Suspicious woman looking through a window

Often, being suspicious in a relationship arises when one of the partners experiences instability.

There are several reasons why suspiciousness suddenly arises in a relationship. Often there is a cause for a lack of trust in a relationship.

“ What loneliness is lonelier than distrust? ” – George Eliot

For instance:

  • Infidelity and adultery.
  • Realizing that you don’t know your partner well.
  • Promises are/are broken.
  • The partner is irresponsible or shows irresponsible behavior.
Man and woman give each other a hug while the man kisses another woman

Can’t you see the cause of your suspicion in the other person? Then the root of your suspicion probably lies in yourself. In that case, the most common causes of being suspicious in a relationship are:

  • Your own insecurity. You don’t think you’re good enough.
  • You have had few previous relationships yourself.
  • You have had toxic relationships, such as with a  narcissist .
  • You have been a victim of sexual abuse.
  • You have been cheated and cannot handle this well.
  • You come from a family where there was suspicion and deceit.
  • You have deceived another, which is now fueling the suspicion in yourself.
  • You have separation anxiety and overly dependent on your partner.
  • You have prejudices towards men/women.

The following video by  Debi Silber talks about post-betrayal syndrome and dealing with suspicion:

Suspicion in people with dementia

Suspicion is common in people with dementia, according to  Alzheimer report. Suspicion can even be one of the first signs of dementia.

Dementia causes a person to lose control of life. He/she doesn’t quite understand what is happening. This can create unpleasant situations and cause unrest in the person with dementia.

How can you deal with suspiciousness in people with dementia?

  • Realize that the other person with dementia is not consciously suspicious, but try to reduce the cause of the suspicion. This prevents the suspicion from getting worse.
  • Explain to others that the suspicion and accusations are not personal. This prevents tensions.
  • A person with dementia is very vulnerable. Do you have a small suspicion that the suspicion may be based on truth? Then investigate this.
  • Reassure the person with dementia and explain the situation. Does this not work? Then you better acknowledge the concern and do your best to resolve it.
  • Psychological or physical ailments can increase suspicion in persons with dementia. Such as infections, fever, pain or hearing loss.
Man makes a puzzle of a head where the brain is missing

If necessary, enlist professional help for suspiciousness in people with dementia.

3 tips to reduce suspicion

When suspicion starts to rule your life too much, it’s time to take action. Only then can you prevent the suspicion from destroying relationships with others.

How can you reduce suspicion? The following tips will help you with this.

It is important to regain a healthy balance between suspicion and trust. If you learn to look at things differently, and can adjust your feelings and behaviour, you will experience that you can influence your thoughts and feelings. That gives confidence in the future.

Man and woman look at each other suspiciously

Tip 1: Work on your self-confidence

As you read above, low self-esteem is a common cause of suspicion.

Because you have low self-esteem, you quickly start to think suspiciously about yourself and your relationship with others.

  • They gossip about me.
  • I think my husband/wife is cheating.
  • They don’t like me.
  • That girlfriend doesn’t want to hang out with me anymore. 

Do you recognize this?

Scientifically Proven: Research  shows that suspicion inadvertently encourages people to mistreat you. By being suspicious of others, you put yourself in a vulnerable position.

This will not make you happy. It is therefore important to work on your self-confidence . Only then can you restore your relationship with your partner, children, family and friends.

The goal is to get you back on your feet and lead a happier life.

Tip 2: Examine yourself

What is the cause of the suspicion? It is not easy to dispel suspicion, but it is certainly possible.

Therefore, examine yourself and your relationship to discover the cause of the suspicion. Use the possible causes I mentioned above for this.

Also look at your expectations of the relationships and whether these are realistic expectations.

Woman with hands against her temple thinks

Tip 3: Talk about it

The ideal solution to reduce suspicion is to talk about it. Therefore, talk to your partner, friends and relatives about what you are suspicious of.

You have to be able to trust each other to enter into a dialogue. Still, this is the best way to reduce suspicion. Especially when the suspicion is on you, but your suspicion is fueled by the behavior of the other.

Reduce Your Suspicion and Jealousy Forever?

You are doing very well! You have already taken the first step and acknowledge your own problem with suspicion.

Woman looks sad and jealous at her boyfriend laughing

But in order to permanently change your jealous and negative attitude, it is important that you learn to create a positive view of yourself and life.

By being suspicious, you put all your energy into suspicious thoughts. This causes more misery than the misery itself.

If being suspicious and mistrusting people starts to rule your life, it’s time to take the next step with the help of a professional. 

Learn here with a practical step-by-step plan how you can remove inner blockages and overcome limiting beliefs for good. I recommend that you really think about yourself in this. It is the key to happiness in life.

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