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What are we doing on Earth? Life Lesson 11: Truth

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‘I mostly see myself through the eyes of the other person,’ she says hesitantly. ‘I try to feel as much as possible what someone else thinks about something and I formulate my answer on that basis.’

She looks at me with big guilty eyes; she probably already fills in for me that I think this is a very bad state of affairs. Only when I smile at her and nod kindly, can she visibly relax. The expected disapproval has given way to reassurance.

What am I doing here on Earth? What is the meaning of my life? Do you know it? Part of a series of 12 articles and read separately, this article discusses Lesson 11 from Life Lesson Theory, based on the work of Steve Rother. Lesson 11 is about Truth.

Attention to the other

People who work with the Truth life lesson mainly seek their truth from others. In fact, they should rely on their own truth , the truth they formulate on the basis of their own thoughts, feelings and findings. It’s not so much that they don’t trust themselves (which is part of the previous life lesson Trust ) but they skip themselves in the search for truth. They take everything from someone else, but nothing from themselves.

It does not occur to them that they skip themselves, their attention is often completely on the other. They are very good at looking at a situation from the other person’s perspective. What something does to them personally is a step that is skipped.

Avoiding the confrontation

When you have been working with this life lesson for a while, there will gradually be more awareness about your own truth. Yet this is then not shared with the outside world; it is often experienced as difficult to be really honest. Confrontations are avoided, first with oneself, secondarily with the other. Lies are invented, excuses are made up, everything in order not to have to stand for one’s own truth.

It could be that someone gets so caught up in lying and twisting that a complete fantasy world is created. As a client of mine recently said: ‘At a certain point I no longer knew who I had told what; but the disturbing thing was that I didn’t even know anymore.’

Thinking that working overtime

Acknowledging that this process is underway and taking responsibility for it is a very important step to take in this life lesson. When we are not completely honest with ourselves, an energy-guzzling process of rationalization starts. This mainly consists of a lot of thoughts, which must confirm the choice/truth. This against better (inner) knowing and feeling.

Thinking is going to work overtime; like a hamster on its treadmill it keeps running around hoping that the truth chosen will eventually be accepted by the Self. But because it does not correspond to its own (covered) truth, thought will never be able to convince the Self. Despite all mindfulness courses, the thinking process will not be calmed.

Acknowledging one’s own truth

Only when the real own truth is recognized and responsibility is taken for it, will the mind be able to calm down again. But especially for people who work with this life lesson, it is a terrifying process. It feels much safer to acknowledge the truth of another. Disagreeing with the other person in a conversation feels like threatening.

ruthless honesty

As with all life lessons, the most difficult step is that of awareness and recognition. Only when the blind spot is held up to the light is it possible to get started. What you are then asked to do is look at yourself and see how you do this. See how to avoid confrontation; look at yourself, see how your attention is completely with the other person and you don’t keep track of what it does to you. Experience how you create illusions about your decisions.

Catch yourself in lies and half-truths. You are asked to be honest. And yes, that can be very painful at times. Especially when shame and guilt take the place of ignorance. The ego is often not amusedwhen the personality is so honestly looked at. Yet that is the way to go; take full honesty and responsibility for your own thoughts, feelings and behavior.

take yourself seriously

Stand up for what you feel and what you think of something, every time, that is what is asked of you. If you do this often enough, you will find that it will become easier and easier. More and more often you take yourself seriously and as a fellow player take your place in the game called life. This takes quite a bit of courage; every time you catch yourself thinking ‘never mind’, this is an invitation to keep going. Because every ‘never mind’ (or ‘I don’t feel like it right now’) indicates that it is your move. You have come to earth in this lifetime to show yourself completely; to yourself and to your fellow man.

Full mastery

When you have finally mastered this life lesson, you will find that you not only know yourself very well, you also take up all the space for your truth, your feelings and ways of thinking. You are able to stay true to yourself in conversations and to confront them where necessary. When you finally realize that there can be many others besides your truth and that this does not threaten your truth, I can congratulate you: you have fully mastered this life lesson.

I wish you a joyful journey!

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