What you focus on grows?

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What you focus on grows?
Many people know the saying: The universe gives you what you are open to. The law of attraction. Attention. I am also involved in self-development and spirituality. Yet I feel resistance to general wisdom such as: ‘You choose your own parents’, ‘Everything is karma’, ‘Everything you experience is a reflection of your inner self.’ Life reflects not only my inner self but that of billions of Earthlings! Were those people there when I picked up my parents?
What do people actually know about my life, let alone past lives? Perhaps souls do not consciously choose their lives or their parents at all but are sent to learn certain lessons. Or maybe those children have a lot to teach their parents, instead of the other way around.

From a parent’s point of view, the ‘What you give, you get back’ will hold true. Children are like mirrors. How educators judge them says a lot about themselves. If they themselves are clear, loving, and calm in their hearts, they also create gentle and relaxed children.

People who find their children annoying and difficult usually are themselves too! Yet children mirror not only their parents but also the other family members, the teachers, their friends, and what they see on television. Also, the commandment to mainly stay in love and to feel connected to ‘everyone’, I cannot yet reconcile with all the violence, abuse, and oppression in the world. Not only does it seem impossible, but also a bit silly and otherworldly to experience nothing but love, unity, trust, and inner peace.

Life is not a pink cloud. Fear, sadness, and anger feel like a logical response to some states. Nevertheless, my own energy, intention, and feeling do work in my immediate environment. So I definitely have an influence on my life and on the whole. Love and truth is my intention. If I believe in something, am confident, and go for it, I am much more likely to succeed than if I am insecure and indecisive. I radiate that.

Everything is related. If I’m kind, I usually get it back. However, influence is not yet controlled. I don’t always know what the outcome will be. Being 100% responsible for my own life and happiness is also not realistic. 50% is already a lot because I also have to deal with the will of other people. People from my immediate environment (family, friends, acquaintances, and bystanders) or invisible people (the government and agencies). Sometimes that works out positively.

What you focus on grows?

A few years ago, I lived accompanied, where I was out of place. I was among the mentally handicapped. I registered with the housing network, but there were still about 200 people waiting in front of me. Then I applied for a declaration of urgency because I could no longer bear to be seen as a disabled person. It was awarded in one go, against people’s expectations. Because nowadays you don’t just get an urgency statement.

I was determined and also met a nice housing consultant. She thought along with me, paid attention to me and stood behind me. Living independently may be the best decision of my life. I can develop further spiritually and people see me more as a full-fledged person. There are events that I have no part in. I can choose how I react to the environment. I allow the beautiful as much as possible. I try to put a positive spin on the ugly. What I give attention grows.

If you add up insignificant events, a butterfly in the United States can cause a hurricane in Florida. Blows usually came from unexpected quarters. The childhood experiences ultimately made me stronger. I transform them. I give lectures and write books and articles to give myself and especially other children a voice. I show how it can be done differently. Hope gives life and has brought me further in life. Even as an adult I know deep valleys. Facing it works better than trying to run from it. Then I allow my feelings, mindfully, without being guided by them (if I can), and try to trust in better times.

I also try to give meaning to the pain, no matter how difficult it is when I’m deep in it. With loving attention, I gain insight into patterns, beliefs, and unprocessed pain. Often I also get an idea of ​​a solution and problems that were previously fixed are moving. That also makes life more fun and lighter. Sometimes I leave the loss or the event for what it is. Just don’t bother with it. I focus on other things and often suddenly an opportunity or solution presents itself.

With an open mind, I am also more receptive to ideas, ideas, and opportunities than when I am always preoccupied. People who see opportunities rather than just limitations are more likely to achieve their goals. Life is not perfect, I have to accept that. To me karma is a law of nature, cause and effect. It has nothing to do with ‘your own fault, big bump.’ When past life events work through into the now, it involves themes, conflicts, and old pain that has not yet been resolved. What you experience in this life does not have to say whether you were a ‘good’ or ‘bad’ person in a previous life.

Karma is not a punishment. People who have grown up in violence and abuse have been told enough that they have made it up to themselves, it is a lesson that they are bad. ‘Enlightened’ souls don’t have to repeat that, not even wrapped in a past life. People who have done no wrong to anyone and who have endured pain and misery deserve love and respect. A safe place to recover. A listening ear. Recognition. Attention. People are accused of being too much in a victim role. But to get out of that role, they must first be able to be victims.

What you focus on grows?

Feeling and expressing emotions are healthy. It helps with processing. It’s liberating. Spirituality should not be an escape from the harsh reality and from pain. Facing something helps better than pep talk and also shows more respect for what someone has been through. To heal my traumas and get into my own energy, I have already been to a Shaman (Miranda) six times. I’ve written about her before. I couldn’t refute anything she said, whereas other people sometimes speak nonsense. Just acknowledging what happened is healing. How the judgments of adults silenced me. I was never heard from again.

Later on people started to listen to me better, but it remained difficult to say what was on my mind. Her attention was loving. She filled me with serene, light energy. My body relaxes. After such a session I feel perfectly clear and calm. My energy field has changed permanently. It feels like an inner shower. I can also open myself to love from the cosmos. Painful events from the past I can face and then let go. I dare to trust my intuition more, so that I see opportunities sooner or notice danger earlier. I have become sharper and more alert and pay attention to it.

It’s a pity that my environment does not resonate with it, so that patterns from my childhood repeat themselves. Miranda calls them “triggers.” An event touches old pain. She assured me that I would never completely relapse. I really have to break my karma myself. No more allowing patterns from the past. However, the change should not come from anger, frustration and pain, but trust, love and truth. I want to let go of the negativity.

What you focus on grows?

Inner freedom has been my motivation for years. Being able to experience carefree fun, being myself, being able to indicate my limits intuitively, being clear-headed, and having inner peace. Working from Unforced Diligence. With pleasure and meaning, without pressure or haste. Sometimes this works better than others. I want to deal with people on the basis of equality. When I go to stay somewhere, I like to contribute with washing dishes, shopping, cleaning up and preparing a meal. That feels better than being served. We share the home and form a mini-community and also conversations, interests, humor and life experience.

We certainly have the opportunity to transcend the conventional system and to shape our lives, but we do need each other for that. Give and take. We all have our strengths and shortcomings, we all have our lessons to learn. We all have a role in our society and can help each other. Exchange knowledge, insights, experience and services. Uninhibited sharing. That ‘work’ immediately contributes to society and the result is immediately noticeable. Only doing what feels right keeps my life path clear. That has not so much to do with where my head is set, but rather to follow my heart. Then I reach my destination.

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