Saturday, December 10, 2022
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When do you choose for yourself?

A short time ago I made the choice to choose for myself and to discover/follow my own path. I always put the wishes and needs of other people first. I always put myself second. I was (and secretly still am a bit) a “People Pleaser”. So, the big word is out. It was difficult for me to see that, because I just really enjoy taking care of people. But of course you can go overboard and I did. I was just taking care of others. I completely lost track of myself.

The size was full

At some point, I had had enough. I no longer wanted to serve other people. It may sound negative, but that’s how it felt to me. This leaned a lot on my shoulders. After a while this became so difficult that I had to make a choice. Do I choose for myself or for the other?

That you do something (taking care of people) that makes you happy, that’s good. But don’t forget yourself! Does it actually make you happy? Or do you feel empty and unhappy afterwards? If the latter is the case, you should think carefully about whether you want to continue with this.

I noticed in myself that every time afterwards I felt unhappy and empty. I helped other people, but it didn’t work for me energetically. It just costs me energy. After experiencing this for the umpteenth time, I decided to change course and put myself first.

The changes in your environment

As soon as you have chosen for yourself and expressed this, the people around you start to change. That was also the case with me. In the first instance they are proud of you that you have “finally” found your own strength and that you dare to stand up for yourself.

But as soon as they notice that they can’t rely on you as much as before, they become less enthusiastic. With this I do not refer to all people in your environment, but to the people who only used you at the time and are now losing their grip on you. There will also be people who will support you in your choice.

You are being pulled from all sides, but you are also being pushed in all sorts of directions. Everyone around you knows what is best for you, because they know you, right? Now let me tell you that, that’s not always the case. For many people the ego comes into play.

Precisely the people you do not expect will send you in a different direction than the direction you want to go. Often this is out of envy or jealousy, because they envy you that you dared to take your step. Don’t let this get in your way. Follow your own feelings and don’t let other people’s emotions/frustrations block and/or demotivate you.

Help from an unexpected quarter

This transformation process is very beautiful. You not only discover your own strength, but you also get a clear picture of your environment. Who can you rely on and who can’t? It is very special, but in situations like this you often get help from people you don’t expect it from. You get help from people who are further away from you, but who wish you success and are proud of you. They may not stay in your life forever. But precisely in this process, you need these kinds of people who support you and take you a few steps further.

Your life revolves around you!

Your life is not about others, it is about you! It’s about being happy in what you do and who you are. What others think is their opinion.

If you have made a very clear choice to choose for yourself and to follow your own path, then you must follow your heart in this. Go by your feeling, make contact with your heart. Be guided by your intuition and not by the opinions of those around you. Some will really want the best for you, but some won’t.

Stand in your own power again, get in touch with your own feelings and follow the path your heart leads you to.

You first, then everyone else.


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