Tuesday, December 6, 2022
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Why am I so unhappy with my life, and will it ever get better?

Dear Jennifer: It seems like years have slipped away from me, when I was always busy with relationships or healing, and now I’m done with all that, I want to go out and have fun, but I have two problems:

I don ‘t know how have fun and I don’t have any friends to share it with. I know I should be taking courses or participating in activities, but I really don’t feel motivated to do that. I also know that I should try every possible way to make friends, but I don’t feel like it either, because I know I’m moving soon, so why make friends here?

I don’t like the people from my area either. Most of them aren’t even my age, and everywhere the people here are so different from me. I don’t feel inspired by anyone here nor do they do anything exciting with their lives.

On top of that, I think I have a third problem, and that is that I have to be very conscious with my money, since my career is also in a transition period, and I can hardly spend any money.

What do I do best then? I know I’m on a tough cycle, and I feel restless, bored, and just sad, day and night. I wasted my time staring at the wall or the TV.

Jennifer’s Answer: You clearly don’t love your life. The first thing I noticed in connection with your question is how many times you said “I should” to describe the things you don’t do. Then you talk about how you don’t like the people in your area and how you don’t feel like you fit in with them.

And you have no money because you are in a transition period. Can you see how your whole life is in transition, and how your belief that you have no control over every aspect of it is blocking you?

Surely if you shifted your beliefs a little, you would discover things you would enjoy, make friends, and improve your financial situation.

First, you need to think about why you should “do” everything. Who said that to you? I think what you are doing now is claiming your authority by doing nothing and then wondering why you are so sad and alone.

Why not choose to do things like courses or activities, make friends, find like-minded people and have fun, because that’s what you want?precious life

Make a commitment to yourself to do something nice at least once a week, whatever that means to you. Be open to making friends and view everything in your life as a choice, rather than an obligation.

You’re being passive aggressive here, and I believe that comes from not being able to make choices for yourself when you were younger, and being forced to do things you didn’t want to. So now that you can do whatever you want, you decide to do nothing. And that’s okay, as long as you recognize that this is your choice and not putting the blame on others, on your area or the people there.

You limit your own life for reasons that you do not understand or are not aware of, but you are still in control of your life. When you decide that you are going to have joy, and that you are going to enjoy every moment of your life, no matter what is happening around you, then you will find joy in where you are.

Start now, you want to be happy, so allow yourself that and then you will discover exactly what you want where you are now, and doors will open that will take you where you want to go.


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